Name me one other animal that drinks the milk of another animal! None! There are none! Cow milk is disgusting and should only be consumed by baby cows!
–My co-worker every time I bait her into a conversation about milk. Not that I would ever bait people into conversations solely for my own entertainment.
Milk and I have had an interesting relationship over the years. It’s always been somewhat complicated as the circumstances of the relationship usually involve a third (female) party.
As a young lad I was somewhat lactose intolerant. Through a series of mediations and readings by the world’s greatest peacmakers, I became far more tolerant as I got older. By the time I was 3 or 4, milk and I had entered into an arranged marriage per my mother’s wishes. Milk every day at breakfast and dinner. By 6, school got in on the action and bumped the mandatory milk drinking up a notch by requiring a third drinking at lunch.
This was back in the good old days when school milk was 2%. So was the milk at home. I have no idea what 2% means, but I know it is a good level of creaminess. Not enough to coat your mouth with perma-film, but enough to make you feel like you aren’t drinking dirty water. But come middle school my mother began to worry that I was burning so many calories playing basketball that she put me on Whole. It took a minute to get used to the practice of drinking unsalted butter, but soon I was hooked.
Whole is fine when you are in college. But once you get older, you just can’t drink (whole) like you used to. I had to cut back. Down to 2% when I got married. Down to skim a couple of years later when I hit the quarter century mark. Stacy was drinking skim, and lobbying me to be a more heart healthy with my calcium intake. Have to keep that plaque from building up on the old innards if I was going to make it to the ripe old age of 30. Funny how 30 doesn’t seem as old as it used to now that I’ve made it to the doorstep.
However, as it stands now I’ve just about given up on milk. Not because of my coworkers rants. I’m no slave to the anti-milk lobby.
The beginning of the end started a couple of years ago. We started splurging on the good milk. The organic stuff in the glass bottles that tastes amazing. It was one of our luxuries, and it was so worth the extra money. The farm was local. The farmer was nicer to the cows. The skim had body and flavor. Bomb diggity.
Now, you can’t just get the good stuff anywhere. You have to go to high socioeconomic areas because of the price point. It wasn’t a huge deal, since we rarely grocery shopped in the neighborhood. One of the burdens of living in the ‘hood is that the grocery stores are horrible. Not just inconvenient, but straight up bad. Stinky. Spoiled food. Poor selection. Rodent problems. Aging buildings. Though we tried to spend as much money as possible in our immediate neighborhood, grocery shopping there was just too much.
But then, an new day. Last month a new grocery store opened up in the neighborhood. The first new grocery store in downtown Kansas City, KS since before I was born. Big. Clean. Good selection. Fresh tortillas. Bakery. Nice meat counter.
But no swanky milk.
We had a choice to make. Support economic development in the inner-city, or keep shopping at grocery stores elsewhere. We decided to rep our ‘hood. Back to the plastic jugs, watery skim and cows that didn’t get the due respect that bovines deserve.
What I have found over the past month is that I’m hardly drinking any milk. I don’t like the way the regular stuff tastes. Whereas I would often have milk for dinner, I’m almost exclusively a water drinker now. I still have milk in my cereal and with my brownies, but I’ve cut way back.
The lady in my life has noticed that I’ve cut back. She’s a little concerned that I won’t get the calcium necessary to support my massively ripped physique sustain healthy bones and teeth. So where else can I get calcium? Sucking on pearls doesn’t sound all that appealing to me, and I’m so bad at taking vitamins that there is no way adding a calcium pill to the equation is a viable option. Any food suggestions that are tasty and high in calcium?
Renew and Restore
