Stacy made an interesting point last night concerning the fact that our children aren’t sleeping well right now.
There are a lot of cultures in the world where family members share rooms and even beds. It’s a practice born out of necessity because of either space or financial constraints. It just doesn’t make sense to have a big ol’ house divided into a bunch of rooms so that everyone can have their own space.
As Americans, we value our individual liberties. So much so that we often project them onto our children by forcing them into their own beds and own rooms at a very young age so that our kids can get out on their own.
Not gonna lie. I was pretty proud of us for getting Zachary to sleep in his own crib very early in the game. But now he is at a point where he is starting to become more social and is actually starting to recognize us and like us. But he’s also having problems sleeping. Every hour or so he’ll start this fussy grunt, and when I pick him up out of his crib he cuddles up next to me and is instantly calmed. Bam. Right back to sleep for another hour or so.
I’m no expert on the matter, but it seems like he just wants a little company. Wants to be held. It’s the same thing with Elli right now. All she wants is to be close to people. As a result, I’ve been sleeping on the couch outside her room this week so that she can see me when she wakes up in the middle of the night and know she’s not completely alone.
So what if we as humans are so programmed to be in community with each other that we even want community when asleep? But then we deprogram our kids at a young age and acclimate them to nocturnal isolation?
An added twist to this equation is that Elli is a HORRIBLE communal sleeper. We used to try to take family naps, but she is a thrasher and a kicker. We sometimes wonder if she is like that because she spent her first 9 months in a crib by herself and thus has no concept of sleeping with others.
Who knows? I figure in a few weeks when I’m better rested I’ll look back on this and either think “wow, we were so insightful in our sleep-deprived state”, or “I need to make sure I never blog when I’m not sleeping well”.
Only time will tell.
Renew and Restore
